Sunday, September 16, 2012


Oh hai microwave...

You know're my second microwave in 5 years. You look pretty freaking awesome. We spent double what we spent on the microwave before you, may it rest in peace. You are 1300-watt and a beast.

And then one day, whilest melting butter, you decide to make a crazy mega demon noise, pop, and start on fire. Why would you do that, mister?


You've melted butter for me a million times. Why would this 15 seconds be any different?

Microwave Deux, I just wanted to tell you that you made me decide to never own a microwave again. The whole planned obsolescence is ridiculous. I pretty much only use you to melt butter anyways. Thanks for nothing.

But on a more serious non-writing-to-an-inanimate-object note, my stupid microwave really did this. No metal in it. Nothing crazy, just a normal 15-second melting of butter. Scared the crap out of me. I'm using it as a timer right now, but pretty soon, it'll be out of my kitchen and I will never own one again. They aren't good to use anyways, so it doesn't bother me. I can heat things in the oven or on the stove. Whatever.

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